Ever have one of those days?
Like say you wake up one morning to find that your possibly-retarded baby cat has pooped on your quilt but it's, like, five in the morning and you just can't deal with this before you have caffeine in your system so you go to the kitchen to light the stove, only to find that the light is burnt out and so you stub your toe on your ridiculously sharp-edged table leg on your way out to the washroom where, when you open the door to the toilet, water cascades over your feet sending your kittens into a flurry of panic?
And then, after you realise you own only three towels and use a big red blanket to clean it up running pink water over your entire apartment, and despite the fact that it is maybe five-thirty in the morning, your totally batshit downstairs neighbor rings your bell about fifty times until you let him into your apartment with two plumbers one of whom lets your seriously doorbell-and-water-tormented kitten run out (but at least he chases her down for you) and then no one can speak English to tell you what they are doing but they all still crowd around your toilet, which seems insanely innappropriate, somehow, while downstairs neighbor alternates between complaining about how your pipes have flooded his washroom and yelling at you for the fact that you are not wearing socks and thus will almost certainly "get the flu and die", and you have to go to work but can't even speak enough Russian to kick everyone out?
For sure, something like this has happened to you before?
But don't worry--it wasn't so bad.
I still had to slip on a patch of ice and smack my head into a railing, causing swelling and a faint bruise above my eye.
Same old, here in Moscow.
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